Random Thoughts: Obama and Batman

When is politics over? I am tired of politics.
What I hate about politics now it’s so myopic and focused on the present day. It’s listing one’s grievances and what they think the government should be doing, but no coherent philosophy linking those grievances or allowing one to judge what is proper for the government to do.
It really is a miracle this country came to be built on eternal truths like “all men are created equal” — truths so profound they were able to outgrow the biases and limitations of the men who wrote them.
My question is what do we do to ensure this country can fight for individual liberty a thousand years from now, not eventually bloating and collapsing on itself like a beached whale.

Thanks to everyone who supports The Babylon Bee. We like to create satire that espouses a wide variety of viewpoints about owning the libs.

Maybe I should predict the 2020 election not on what I think what will happen but on what I think we deserve. Perhaps it will be really close with lots of recounts.

Well that’s the second to last time I trust Steve Bannon.

So you have “anti-fascist” and “anti-racist.” All you need is one more time the left uses “anti” when they mean “pro,” and you have a trend.

The Obama speech made me really nostalgic for making fun of Obama.
It’s no fun making fun of Trump. That’s like ridiculing a clown. But Obama was so elitist and haughty and arrogant yet incompetent — he was perfect.
I don’t think Biden will be anywhere near as fun, but I’ll give it a good college try if he’s elected.

I don’t know how Portland became the capital of racism and fascism but I hope those protestors are able to overthrow it.

I think it’s becoming clear that while Democrats may be good for a number of things, they should never run cities.

You should never be impressed by a politician reading a speech off a teleprompter.
How often in our lives do we need it reenforced how empty words are — especially the words of a politician? Apparently, 80,000 times isn’t enough.
Partisan politics is just a dog constantly returning to its own vomit.

The main problem of racism is the demonization and hatred of your fellow man, but many think demonization and hatred is righteous if employed to fight racism. And that’s why we’re not getting anywhere.

I heard Biden plans to defund Space Force and leave us space vulnerable to space threats.

I’m reading “Nothing Lasts Forever” because of its historical value as being the basis for the movie Die Hard, though it is a bit weird to read a Christmas story in August.

I’m pretty curious how Trump will react if he loses. But I’m also curious how the left will react if they lose to Trump a second time. So whatever happens, it will be interesting and fun!

There was never a good time to premiere Fish Police, but this would have been an even worse time.

Ad that would get me to vote for Biden:
some left-wing weenie drones on about all his ideas to change things only to realize Biden had fallen fast asleep while listening
“Biden 2020: He’s too old for radical change.”

Democrats still hold onto their crazy conspiracy theories even though they’ve never even proved there is a Russia.

I’m hyped for the new Wonder Woman movie. Does that make me a feminist?

Dark and gritty is good for Batman and the Punisher but few other superheroes.

I really think Batman would work better as a TV series, Netflix Daredevil being a good template for it. Batman is fine fighting mobsters and more grounded villains; he doesn’t need a $200 million special effects movie.
Batman actually comes off as silly to me when he joins with the Justice League to fight aliens; it really emphasizes he’s just a guy in a costume.
That said, he would win in a fight with Superman.
Oh yeah, when does Superman finally go into public domain? I’d love to try to make an interesting Superman story because it seems so difficult.

The only time superhero masks seemed to work was the 1989 Batman. As a kid, I was convinced it was another actor than little Michael Keaton playing Batman.

I remember one thing that surprised about that Space Force Show is that China was the villain. Despite the Chinese government being a good villain, you don’t see that very often for obvious reasons.

After disassembling the switch panel and the light fixture and using a multimeter, I diagnosed that the problem was I needed to change the lightbulb.
I guess just some LED bulbs are cheapo and will go bad after a year or two but that’s way different than when an incandescent bulb burns out and makes it look like you have a weird electrical problem (turns on briefly when you turn the switch off, etc.).

Partisanship means you could have one of the worst presidents in history but most of the attacks on him will still be stupid nonsense.

It seems like there might be a Babylon Bee joke about this Rose Garden stuff, but then I’d have to read about what people are actually saying and I can’t bring myself to dive into what I just know is going to be new scraping of the bottom of the barrel of stupidity.
I need everyone to be less dumb so then I can make an even dumber take as satire. If there is no way to go even dumber than reality, I got nothing.

I would love to see Batman fight antifa. That would really work out because Batman is kind of fascist, and I think most of antifa would really benefit from getting punched in the face by a billionaire.

One warning sign in a man’s bookshelf is if all the books are hollowed out and have a gun inside.
It’s a warning he’s awesome!

And if he has any of my books, that means he’s a really cool dude.

Charlie Kirk is a real person? I thought that was just another term for “straw man.”

“Why does the Joker look so clowny?”
“I don’t know. Why does Batman looks so batty?”
“It’s in his name. But the Joker is called the Joker, not ‘Clown-man.’”
I don’t want to admit my daughter has a point. It would make me look weak.

Oh no. Now my kids are asking my about the movie Batman v Superman.
“Why did Batman want to fight Superman?”
“Because… Ugh. Don’t make me revisit the plot of that movie.”

“Who won the fight?”
“Well, Batman would have, but then Superman said ‘Martha.’”

There are a few politicians I kind of like. Those are the ones I should be most scared of.

What if absolutely everyone handled the pandemic terribly?

I was on the Fantastical Truth’s podcast talking about Superego, the Babylon Bee, and little Winchester. Check it out!

They don’t care about black people. If they actually cared, they’d worry whether their tactics are effective. This is all about them.
Bad protesting behavior isn’t from caring too much. It’s from caring too little.

How would the left feel if a bunch of Kimberly Guilfoyles mobbed and shouted at them every time they sat down to eat?

Trump doesn’t have to be great. He doesn’t even have to be good. He just has to clear the low bar of being better than the left.
Unless Biden successfully divorces himself from them.

… Which Has No Appeal

Submitted by Slapout:

If you have content you’d like to submit, please use our submissions page.