Tuesday Open Thread: Common-Sense Bee Control

Off-duty firefighter rescues man from huge swarm of bees in car
NY Post | 30 Mar 2021 | Marisa Dellatto

A New Mexico resident’s trip to the grocery store turned into the stuff of nightmares when a swarm of 15,000 bees took over the back seat of his car. Luckily, an off-duty firefighter who practices beekeeping came to the rescue.

On Sunday, March 28, a Las Cruces shopper left their car windows down while heading into a grocery store. When they returned and began to drive away, they realized thousands of bees had invaded their vehicle.

Thankfully, firefighter Jesse Johnson works as a beekeeper in his spare time. Although he wasn’t working that day, the team called him in for his expert help. Johnson arrived at Albertsons grocery store in a full safety get-up with a hive kit and lemongrass oil. It took two hours for the hive master to get all the insects from the car. The bees were then relocated to Johnson’s home.

In photos posted by the fire department, the clump of bees looked extremely frightening. While they flew around, Johnson appeared unfazed as he calmly collected them.

1. Roll up your windows.

2. Never go shopping.

3. When starting your car, check your rear view mirror for 15,000 bees.

4. Never acquire enemies in Las Cruces.

5. If you do, stay out of Las Cruces. Or repeat steps 1 through 3.

Democrats Finally Locate a Person With No Photo I.D.

“I just don’t know where it is,” said Joe Davis. “I can’t find it.”

Media outlets are researching his ethnicity to see if racism is involved.

IMAO: Ahead of the Curve!

I know what one of the inevitable Outrage Mob upcoming outrages will be, for sending a bad, insulting message!

Wedding rings.

Please tell me I’m wrong. . .

(I hate giving them ideas.)

Do TV Weathermen Dream of Electric Sleet?

Saw this headline on an Accuweather sidebar, and just had to click on the story to see what the deal was.

Legendary TV Meteorologist Faced a Forecaster’s Worst Nightmare
Maura Kelly | April 4, 2021

I’ll give the answer away in a second. But it really had me guessing until I got to the story:

Was is a TV meteorologist’s worst nightmare?

Shartnado? A young blonde assistant meteorologist being added to the lineup? Knowing dirt on Hillary?

Do TV meteorologists have different “worst fears” than other humans?

(Turns out it was watching a tornado warning pass over his house.)

Straight Line of the Day: Everybody’s Favorite Victim — Hollywood — Is Now Going To Whine About…

Straight Line of the Day: Everybody’s favorite victim — Hollywood — is now going to whine about…

Welcome to IMAO! We Want To Surgically Implant This Because . . . Um . . . Covid . . .

Caption This!

“Oh Mr. Walrus, the new Caption This! has arrived”.

Well send it right in, the people await!

Guess What, Kid? We All Feel That Way

A new day full of promise, yeah, but — yecchhhh! — what a harsh world!

Depending on where his hand is, I would have titled this “We all cop a feel this way.”