Tuesday Night Open Thread: Hold My DeBeers

No Joke: Parrot in Bangkok Swallows 21 Diamonds After Raiding Owner’s Jewellery Box
AsiaOne | June 24, 2021 | Amierul Rashid

Polly want a safecracker?

On Tuesday (June 22), Frosty, a pet parrot in Bangkok, Thailand, raided its owner’s jewellery box and appeared to be enamoured of what it had found inside.

A diamond necklace caught the bird’s eye and that spelt trouble — Frosty decided to gobble the sparkly jewels up for breakfast.

By lunchtime, the eight-month-old sun parakeet looked weak and had lost its appetite.

Noticing something was off, the bird’s owner quickly brought it to the nearby Animal Space Hospital for an X-ray.

(The Animal Space Hospital doesn’t actually sound like it’s all that nearby.)

The operation took over two hours and vets recovered 21 diamonds, each around 0.2 carats, that the bird pecked from the woman’s necklace.

Do you have something you’d like to share? A link? A joke? Some words of wisdom? A topic to discuss? It’s our nightly Open Thread, and you have the floor.

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IMAO Celebrates Hottentot Pride Day

That’s it: just today. And the day’s almost over.

Congress Passes Bill To Pay Off Debts Of Everyone in America Except You

In a bipartisan move, all members of Congress agreed to eliminate their own debts, the nation’s debts, and the debts of everyone in America — except you.

“This is a proud moment for America,” said Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi. “We hope you, however, will pay off your racist balance.”

Poem — No Particular Parody

… just sometihng from earlier tonight…

♩♪

A synod on synodality
An open conference on conferencing;
A panel on banality
A selfie about self-referencing.

The final word on finality
Social media on social distancing
A virtual meeting about reality —

Evolving self-consistencing.

Elaboration on collaboration
With peers you haven’t met in years

A little token
That you’re awoken
To thoughts unspoken —
Like the concept of “token.”

Today’s Lessen

Submitted by Gumbeaux:

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Democrats Offer Republicans Free Vacation — Or a Chance To Win a Luxury Yacht! — If They Buy a 6-Trillion-Dollar Condo in Surfside, Florida

Psaki Shirkles Back: Insists “There Is Categorically No Linkage Between the Deals”

“Pinky Schwer,” She Says, Using German

Mitt Romney Snaps Up Offer

Major, On Roof, Snaps Up Romney

Speaking in Tongue-Twisters

Vatican Asks All Catholic Dioceses to Take Part in Synod on Synodality
Catholic World Report | 5/21/21 | Courtney Mares

The Vatican announced Friday that the Synod of Bishops on synodality has been postponed to 2023, with a two-year consultative preparatory phase involving Catholic dioceses worldwide.

The synod on synodality will officially open with a “diocesan phase” in October 2021 and conclude with the XVI Ordinary General Assembly of the Synod of Bishops at the Vatican in October 2023.

Cardinal Mario Grech, the general secretary for the Synod of Bishops, said in an interview with Vatican News published May 21 that the synod has been transformed “from an event into a process.”

John 16:29 (King James Bible):

His disciples said unto him, “Lo, now speakest thou plainly . . .”

Thurston Howls

Submitted by Slapout:

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Boundaries, Joe — Boundaries

WTH? Joe Biden Renames New Mexico During Live Stream With Governors (VIDEO)
Gateway Pundit | May 12, 2021 | Cristina Laila

“I’m just waiting for them to tell me when we get going here since we’re live streaming this,” Biden said not realizing the live stream had already started. “I’m supposed to look over here and not at you guys.”

Then Biden renamed New Mexico.

“I know Minnesota is great but it can’t be as nice weather as there is in Mexico,” Biden said of New Mexico.

He did it again…

“We got six governors with us today – Democrats and Republicans… Governor [Michelle] Lujan Grisham of Mexico.”

Straight Line of the Day: Wait … If Walrus Is Going To Be Gone For Two Weeks, What’s He Likely To Be Doing?

Straight Line of the Day: Wait … If Walrus is going to be gone for two weeks, what’s he likely to be doing?

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Welcome to IM – – Holy Heck! Get Out of Here!

Caption This!

I’m laughing already.

TM

Submitted by Slapout: