Signs That You’re Not in a Good Restaurant: …
The drunkard thats a couple of tables away from you gets up and goes outside to puke and then comes back in and starts eating again…3 different times. (true story jack, no joke)
… after the drive-thru attendant hands you your drink, you hear the following exchange inside:
“Did you give him a drink?”
“Yeah.”
“OK, tell the next customers that we’re out of cups.”
its got “fusion” in its name
It’s a Mexican restaurant in the back side of a strip mall in Helen, Georgia.
Zaphoid just handed you a pan galactic gargle blaster.
Signs That You’re Not in a Good Restaurant: …
The drunkard thats a couple of tables away from you gets up and goes outside to puke and then comes back in and starts eating again…3 different times. (true story jack, no joke)
Food so nice, you’ll eat it thrice!
…the bouncer frisks you for weapons, finds one, winks and lets you in…
… there’s sawdust on the floor, but it’s not a “theme” restaurant…
The salad bar has a slot for used needles.
Uber Eats shows up to deliver.
That ain’t Mountain Dew.
The Pu Pu platter smells like … well …. ahem …
When you ask the waitress, “What’s good?” she replies, “The 911 response time.”
You are in a restaurant in Russia or Ukraine. Just pick one.
They refill your soda from unfinished cups left by other customers.
Hunter Biden recommended it.
When you ask the waitress “What do you recommend?”, and she gives you a list of other restaurants.
When they have a frequent visitor punch card, every 5 punch outs gets you a free stomach pump.
The complementary after dinner mints are Tums.
Hate to admit, that’s true in my kitchen too! 🙂
The cook is Walter White.
Every appetizer and entree on the menu has Spam.
I don’t get it.
Biscuits are off!
Rat tart, rat sorbet, rat pudding . . .
Signs That You’re Not in a Good Restaurant: …
proudly displays a “Voted best” contributor by local Funeral Directors 5 years running.
… after the drive-thru attendant hands you your drink, you hear the following exchange inside:
“Did you give him a drink?”
“Yeah.”
“OK, tell the next customers that we’re out of cups.”
True story.
It’s a Japanese steak house in South Bend, Indiana. (Personal experience)
Stacey Abrams avoids their buffet
~~~~
Extra!
They bill it as dinner and a show, but it’s just dinner and a large front window across the street from the homeless shelter.
They still ask for your vaccine passport.
It’s the one place in the city where you want to wear a mask.
You are anywhere in Wales.
You mistakenly taste the finger bowl and it is better than the gin and tonic you paid too much money for..
Sends out mailers promoting botulism free Fridays.
Wuhan flesh eating bacteria farm is suing them for unfair business practices.