President Trump admitted that it’s true that real socialism has never been tried. He also said that should happen immediately so that it can also be convicted, sentenced, and executed.

Liberals are OK with North Korea’s nuclear program, but they are furious at President Trump because in all his meetings and negotiations with North Korea, he never once asked them to give up plastic straws.

President Trump has already picked out his Halloween costume to terrify liberals: he’ll be going as accurate climate data.
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So, who’s more likely to win this election? President Trump who’s at Troll Level: Machiavelli on Twitter, or the senile eye-bleeder who’s still JoeBiden1942@aol.com?

President Trump has a full-time staffer whose sole job it is to put random misspellings in his tweets. Rumor has it he’s also Russian. Sorry… Rossian.

At a Rose Garden press conference, President Trump admitted that he has been secretly keeping all evidence of him colluding with Russia in a corrugated metal shack in the Bahamas.

You know the press has gone off the deep end when they accuse President Trump of having an emotional support Velociraptor. Who is also racist.

A tweet by President Trump saying “retweet if you think feminists are humorless scolds” was retweeted a million times, all by angry women commenting “That’s not funny!”

CNN is torn between between loving the hurricane for distracting from Biden’s gaffes and hating it for not doing enough to make President Trump look racist.

Democrats are now moving to impeach President Trump after he proposed a system of “Reverse Communism” where only millionaire politicians are required to renounce all property, pool their resources, and share equally for the common good. Yes, he knows he’s a billionaire and thus exempt.

Amazing how a bunch of leftists who don’t believe in God or respecting religion have no problem casting President Trump in the role of Satan.

To placate the Democrats, President Trump has agreed to require that all guns in America be registered. The registration process will consist of the owner writing down his name on a form along with a list of every gun owned, by serial number. The form is then filed by dousing it with gasoline and igniting it.

To placate liberals, President Trump offered to say something that was actually racist, but they just got madder at him because all he did was quote famous Democrat politicians.