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Bryce and Lulu, hands still cuffed behind their backs, were led out of the transport to a landing platform atop the research center where a half dozen Protectors — or at least people in Protector uniforms — were waiting for the new arrivals.
“They’re all fakes! Shoot them! Shoot them now!” Lulu yelled.
“Darius is here,” one of them said, ignoring Lulu.
“We knew that,” Lara responded.
Colette and her men looked surprised. “We?”
“You know your part in this; let us handle ours.” Lara walked over to Bryce and Lulu but looked to the guards behind them. “Take Ronove new test subjects to their room.”
“So what are you doing with us?” Bryce asked.
“Fun stuff, I assure you,” Lara said with mild annoyance.
“Seriously, what the hell are you doing with them?” Colette asked.
“I don’t answer to you anymore, Colette.” Lara looked at Charlene. “You know your job?”
“It’ll get done.” Charlene turned to Bryce and Lulu. “Just don’t be stupid. Your one advantage in the end is that no one really cares whether in the end you’re alive or dead.”
Lulu spat at her. “Don’t even talk to us, you downward facing dog!”
Charlene headed inside with some of the Amazons in disguise. Bryce and Lulu were led to another entrance by two Amazons, one dressed as a Protector and another as staff. The area seemed empty and, they were soon led into what looked like an examination room. “Sit down and be quiet,” they were ordered.
Bryce and Lulu complied, taking two small chairs at the back of the room.
The tall one in the Protector uniform took of the skull-like mask. “What’s with these stupid helmets?”
“They’re supposed to be intimidating,” the other Amazon answered.
“Also, it conceals your ugly face!” Lulu turned to Bryce. “Zing! I got her good. Didn’t I?”
The tall one walked over and punched Lulu in the gut, knocking her to the ground. “I thought I told you to stay quiet, you stupid skank.”
“I thought that was just a boilerplate threat since we’re hostages!” Lulu got back to her chair. “I didn’t know you meant it seriously!” Lulu started crying. “And you didn’t have to call me names! That’s just being mean for no reason!”
The woman sighed. “How long are we supposed to wait here?”
“They’ll give us a signal when we can move them further in without risk of notice,” the other answered.
“You’re my boyfriend today,” Lulu whispered to Bryce. “You have to beat her up for being mean to me.”
“I’m not your boyfriend, Tri-Lu… and I don’t beat up women.”
Lulu rolled her eyes. “So you’re only for emotionally harming them?”
Bryce scoffed. “I don’t respond to cheap shots like that.”
“What are you two talking about?” the mean woman asked.
Lulu stood up. “We’re plotting to kill you.” She walked over to the enemy. “And it’s going to be such a good plot, there will be nothing you can do to stop it!”
Bryce got up too. “Lu, let’s not do this.”
“You don’t want to mess with me!” Lulu, her hands still cuffed behind her back, stood up threateningly to their two guards. “I’m very Asian! I could use all manner of kung fu on you!”
“You two better…” The mean woman was interrupted by Lulu’s forehead slamming into her face. The other Amazon rushed to help, but Bryce slipped his hand out of the loosed cuffs and grabbed her in a chokehold. He held her tight until she went unconscious and gently brought her to the ground. Bryce then looked towards Lulu to see she had also removed her cuffs and was busy slamming a head repeatedly into a table.
“That doesn’t look like kung fu.” Bryce began finally removing the shiny Serpine uniform he had on.
“She wasn’t worth kung fu.” Lulu tossed the body to the ground. “So how long is yours going to be out?”
Bryce shrugged. “I really don’t the science behind choking people.” He finished getting off his uniform and straightened the suit he had on underneath.
“You could have just snapped her neck.” Lulu started removing her uniform too.
“Is it really as simple as they make it look on TV?” Bryce took a pistol off the unconscious woman and placed it in the holster under his shirt jacket. “You just twist the head really hard or something and ‘snap’ the guy’s dead?”
“I dunno. Ask Charlene.” Lulu fixed the skirt of the business suit she had on and took a pair of glasses out of the breast pocket.
“I’m afraid she’d get overzealous in the instructions.” Bryce took a transmitter out of his pocket and placed it in his ear. “The puppies got hugs.”
“Any response?” Lulu took a pistol off of her victim.
“She’s probably not in a position to talk… and you don’t get to come up with code phrases anymore.”
“Someone had to take charge and do it.” Lulu hit a small button on the side of her glasses. “I think I know where we are. Just follow me.”
They headed towards the exit to see that Colette was standing there watching. “You guys really like people underestimating you, don’t you?”
“Glad you’re here,” Lulu said. “There was a big accident and–”
“I don’t care what you care what you did to Elza’s idiots. I’ll probably kill a few myself before the day is over.”
Bryce contemplated whether he could reach for his gun in a casual manner. “Uh… aren’t they your allies.”
Colette shrugged. “It’s getting hard to keep track these days.” She inspected the woman at Bryce’s feet. “This one isn’t dead.” Colette picked the woman up by her neck with one hand, snapped it, and tossed the body aside without the slightest effort.
“Yes, a lot of duplicity going about. It’s a shame.” Bryce smiled, acting best he could that he hadn’t seen anything at all that might be considered quite disturbing.
“I think we’re up to like quinplicity at this point.” Lulu turned to Colette with fierce determination on her face. “Anyhoo, you can try and kill us if you want, but people usually find that’s a lot more trouble than it’s worth. And if you’re angry about me kicking you out a window, I just want you to know that was done totally in jest.”
She chuckled. “I’m not here to kill you. Here’s the situation, Hellbender, there’s a huge conflict brewing, and Dammon’s decided it’s time to pick sides.”
“So… you’re picking Asmod or Serpine’s side?” Bryce asked.
“Actually, we think they’re both really just bystanders in this conflict.” Collete said. “The side we’re picking is yours.”
Lulu gave her the thumbs up. “Smart choice.” She then turned to Bryce and whispered, “We count as a side?”
NEXT
More please!
Oh, yeah, and First!
Sarah Palin she hates cats!
Sarah Palin she eats rats!
Sarah Palin came in third!
Sarah Palin is a turd!
Sarah Palin is a fool!
Sarah Palin is not cool!
Sarah Palin we don’t like you
Hey Sarah Palin f*** you
“The puppies got hugs.”
Best code phrase ever. I am SO using that… assuming my mortal enemies don’t read Hellbender.
Naw. I’ll use it.
I’m a little confused, but if i take time to re-read some of the older posts, i’ll likely catch back up. It’s just been so dang long since i got to read one, my own life is getting mixed up in my head.
You know, my spying and disguising and neck-snapping and such.
Yeah, post a tad more often if possible. I was rather lost at a couple places since it’s been a while.
At least you posted it!
When Sarah Palin visits San Francisco, it’s temporarily the straightest city in the country.
When Sarah Palin is Vice President, she plans to open up the federal government’s strategic reserve of whup-ass.
Sarah Palin easily caught the Road Runner on her first try…and then force fed it to a moose
The Qur’an says that if you touch pork you will be unclean and if you touch Sarah Palin you’ll be dead…and then run over by her husbands snowmobile
hey Frank j. i just saw this and gagged. just thought u might wanna check this out and let people know how low obama can go http://www.breitbart.tv/?p=170953
Dear Mr. President,
Were you a lonely boy?
Are you a lonely boy?
Are you a lonely boy?
How can you say
No child is left behind?
We’re not dumb and we’re not blind.
They’re all sitting in your cells
While you pave the road to hell.
What kind of father would take his own daughter’s rights away?
And what kind of father might hate his own daughter if she were gay?
I can only imagine what the first lady has to say
You’ve come a long way from whiskey and cocaine.
Mr. President are some kind of retarded cowboy?
Do you dream gay thoughts of Richard Cheney?
How is it possible that Palin is dumber than you?
Was she raised in the monkey cage at the zoo?
wow how long did it take you to come up with that retard imposter? you might want to go get a job rather than sit in front of your computer all day trying to get a couple words to rhyme (fail by the way)
Nice installment Mr. J.
WTF is with the Palin posters/posers? Crikey! don’t they realize that this is a Hellbender post.
Woohoo awesome that HellBender is back
little editing for you:
“Take Ronove new test subjects to their room.”
missing ‘s
Bryce shrugged. “I really don’t the science behind choking people.”
missing the know i think
Keep up the good work Frank
Oh hell ya! Hellbender is hella awesome!!! 🙂
(No Palin comments in the Hellbender posts people. Use the lolterizt posts from now on please.)
Hey, thanks for waiting for me to catch up to everyone else (I just started reading Hellbender today). Now that I’m up to speed, you can post the remaining episodes!
Good work!