Hide your kids, hide your husbands, Republicans be rapin’ ev’rybody

Joe Biden wants to raise your taxes so you won’t get raped.


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Excerpt:

In 2008, when Flint had 265 sworn officers on their police force, there were 35 murders and 91 rapes in this city. In 2010, when Flint had only 144 police officers, the murder rate climbed to 65 and rapes–just to pick two categories–climbed to 229. In 2011, you now only have 125 shields. God only knows what the numbers will be this year for Flint if we don’t rectify it. And God only knows what that number would have been had we not been able to get a little bit of help to you.

So, if you weren’t raped or murdered this year, thank Joe Biden and Barack Obama.

If you were raped or murdered, blamed the Republicans. In fact, the Republicans are tired of rapists and murders getting all the credit. They have formed a task force to climb into your windows, snatch your people up, and rape them.

How do you defend against it? You need to hide your kids, hide your wife, and hide your husbands because the Republicans will be raping everybody.

And they’re all racist. Especially that colored fellow. He’s the most racist of them all.

Presidential Election Prediction Talk

Since everyone under the sun, it seems, is predicting the election outcome and its fallout I am compelled to do the same.

Daring anyone to prove me wrong….. I predict that:

  1. Our new President-elect will be male, human and over 35. It will be person who spent a significant portion of their younger years in Asia. Possibly, just possibly even a natural born American citizen who has lived on American soil for 8 or more years.
  2. Our new Vice President-elect will have at the same number of X chromosomes as there are syllables in their day-by-day nicknames. Furthermore this individual will be a parent to multiple children, one serving in the armed forces.
  3. In no particular order, McCain and Obama will easily be the top two vote getters.
  4. Bob Barr (Libertarian) will be a distant but respectable third.
  5. The advanced alien life forms who manipulate us at their whim will have a good laugh in their giant hidden sub-ocean outposts. Admittedly this one will be the hardest to verify.
  6. People will be glad this crap is over until they realize it never… really… is.

It’s okay to hang Sarah Palin

I’m sure you’ve seen the stories about the house out in Hollywood that decorated for Hallowe’en by putting up an effigy of Sarah Palin … hanging by the neck.

Some have criticized the display, demanding it be taken down. Others don’t like it, but say it’s all in fun. And then there are those that wish it was really Sarah Palin hanging there.

Me? I’m a supporter of Gov. Palin, and I think the display of her being hung is … perfectly fine.

Continue reading ‘It’s okay to hang Sarah Palin’ »

International Crises You Can Believe In

Biden says things are going to look really bad, internationally, for America after Obama is anointed. It’s going to look like Obama fumbled the ball, big time.

I’m guessing Biden is planning to address the U.N.

Advice for McCain: Use unedited Biden speeches for your commercials. See if they call that “going negative.”

Biden’s brain scans found

The Democrat vice presidential candidate, Sen. Joe Biden, finally released his medical records. But something was missing.

The brain scans.

In case you forgot … or never knew … Biden twice underwent surgery in 1988 to repair damage from aneurysms.

But the medical records, released recently, didn’t include any brain scans:

But the 49 pages of records the campaign released gave no indication that Biden’s doctors sought follow-up tests after the serious aneurysms he suffered in 1988. Medical experts are divided over the need for such precautionary brain scans, but many feel it is the only way to be sure a patient is out of danger.

“If this was my patient, I would re-image every three to five years to make sure no new aneurysm had cropped up,” said Dr. Mark Alberts, a professor of neurology at Northwestern University’s Feinberg School of Medicine.

Not to worry. Our crack team of investigators has uncovered the missing brain scans…
Continue reading ‘Biden’s brain scans found’ »

Biden and Albright compare notes before debate . . .

. . . on hair plugs.